I’ve mentioned in a previous post about that niggling little voice that occasionally pops up and makes me question my writing/blogging abilities (just one of the many things that little voice invites me to question when it decides to pipe up from time to time).
Well, today is one of those days when that doubtful little doubter is shouting at me, loud and clear. And sadly, I’m listening.
I often think about topics for blog posts that I would love to write, keen to satisfy my own love for writing and desire to discuss a certain topic, and keen to hopefully inspire others in the process, too. But then what happens to all those ideas I have? Very rarely do they come to fruition. I have a list in my phone that’s ever growing with blogging ideas but do I sit down and get some of those thoughts and ideas down on virtual paper? Do I hell. I let life get in the way for long enough, I ignore the fact that I’m letting life get in the way until eventually, that niggling doubtful voice pops up and tells me that this little old blog is a joke so I may as well just quit now. Draw a line under this whole thing.
I was chatting with a friend at the weekend about our blogging experiences and when we were talking, I was reminded why I set this humble little blog up nearly five years ago (wow – I didn’t actually realise it was that long ago until I checked!), and I was inspired to continue with it. But today, I haven’t been feeling quite so positive about it. I’m thinking about all the things I could have done with this blog in the past five years and all the things I haven’t actually done.
But I don’t want to feel this way. I don’t want to hone in on the negative. I want to see the positive in life and over the past few months I can tell I’m getting better at doing that in general, so I must continue with that practice. This little blog may not have set the world on fire – and nor should it need to in order for it to be worthwhile – but I want to continue with it. I want a little blog to be proud of, filled with authenticity, honesty and, well, me. After all, it is my blog.
I’ve read so many amazingly real and honest blog posts from talented bloggers lately that I’ve felt inspired to carry on and try to share my story more – not just the cake recipes, although I do find those fun to create when I’m not having a baking disaster and getting stressed about it.
What I think I’ve been doing is thinking of all the blog posts I’d like to create but then feeling scared about actually writing them in case they’re not just right, in case I’m judged. But like I said earlier, I want a blog that’s real and honest, and real and honest is right enough for me, I realise that now. And I also realise I need to stop being such of a bloody people pleaser. People will judge.
So, I’m putting this out there before I change my mind. I want to continue blogging, I’d like to hopefully meet new bloggers and become inspired by the many amazing stories out there. I want to live but not use the excuse that life is just getting in the way of me creating anything. I don’t want that little voice at the back of my head to have any more negativity to share on the matter. And so that’s what I’m going to aim for.